LGBT Morality

The stereotype of the LGBT community is that it is sexually permissive -- anything goes. And, like most stereotypes, there's a serious grain of truth there. I know a number of folks who have had and/or are having a lot of sex. Sex is quite casual for them, and a number of my gay friends say it is "worse" here in San Francisco than in other cities. People let loose more here than elsewhere.

And, while I haven't exactly been an angel, that lifestyle is not what I want. I was discussing this with a counselor yesterday (yes, I got over my mistrust of mental health professionals) what I really want in life. And it's not to have obscene amounts of sex with as many guys as I can convince to sleep with me. What I really want -- and what I believe most people really want -- is to express myself physically with someone with whom I have a deep emotional connection and with whom I share some sort of commitment. And while that's not an exact statement of Biblical sexual morality, it seems like that's the great point of Biblical sexual morality (also, children, arguably).

The problem is that there's a huge dearth of scholarship and theological reflection on LGBT sexuality. It seems like there are two positions -- gay sex is wrong, wrong, wrong, WRONG. That's the sum total of theology there. The other position is that gay sex is OK with God. The only inference I can draw from that position is that as much as you want is also OK with God, or perhaps some sort of "do no harm" premise which seems implicit in Christianity generally. But both positions are unsatisfying. Someone needs to think about gay people and sex and figure out how/when sex is OK, in the absence of the institution of marriage. A "committed relationship?" What does that look like? When you're dating seriously? When you've done some sort of marriage equivalent? Or is it really whenever so long as you're not using the other person? Or is the only limitation not hooking up?

I'll have to think about this more.